Monday, March 8, 2010

The Eternal Truth

Some things never change, some truths remain truths how so ever contradictory they may be to the laws of men and masks. I am a Mask and I am integral to the Man and I know that love is one such truth. The love never changes, it may morph itself in to an irreverent form of emotion - jealousy, revenge, hatred but none of that will ever change the true essence of love. Do not let the masks fool you; do not let the masks that the innocent face might wear fool you. The love shall remain yours forever!

Embrace the innocent face and her masks just as you have embraced your own, let her dance to the music that the Mask plays for her. Beneath the farcical glow of jealousy, fear and insecurity lies the deeply serene love for you. The love that lasts forever; the love that will keep you alive and give you hope.

Accept love as the only truth, the only path to your salvation and the hounds of death will not be near you. Hold my hand as you stand on this precipice today, let the balm of hope soothe the sores of your skin and soul back to youth. The Man and the Mask, together forever living in love..for love.

The Sands of Time

The sands run down my closed fist and make no sound, just a deafening roar inside my being. I close my fist harder; trying to hold on to what I wished was mine but always knew that it never was. For years and centuries I have longed to possess, be possessed without ever letting my freedom get away from me, not realizing that contradictions never last.

Yet I have lived in contradictions, shifting my anchor from one base to another; from one face to another. The innocent face has watched me with awe and shock as I have let my life seize control of my time. My dreams no more lure her, my charms no more exude the power of timelessness that I so undeniably possessed. I have for so long feared the advance of age, the withering away of my youthful exuberance that I now feel almost powerless as I see it encroach upon me with the gruesome certainty of death itself.

Oh yes, I feel so dark today!

The hounds must be lurking in the dark; licking their blood stained lips. The imposing persona of the all conquering man is about to crumble. The cracks in the skin are widening, the time for the redemption of all unanswered curses on his being is upon us all. The Man will finally become mortal again, after centuries of conquest and parallel existences in his dreamy wonderland; he will no longer have another dream to live for; another tomorrow to call upon.

The sands of time, trickling away..the ground beneath the Man’s feet..sinking.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

The Broken Dreams

If only I had taken the Mask off my face on that fateful moment when I surrendered my entire being and destiny to the throes of this futile existence; If only I knew that being a man did not mean to simply please all who came but to do as the heart demands; I would not look back at my life with such repugnant disgust.

How I miss the spark of youth, the ability to rebel and the pleasure of doing the unthinkable!

Today, I stand here soaking the cold breeze of the after storm and I ask myself once again, who is to be blamed for the demise of my dreams? Who is to be blamed for the non-attainability of every beautiful dream I ever saw and still see? My dreams were never mine alone and yet I had to crush them all with my trampling feet and reluctant fist!

I shall dream more, for in my dreams alone do I still see some hope of survival; farcical as it may seem. Yet, how many more dreams to shatter, how many more hearts to be broken before I finally meet my end. How much longer to go before I get to wipe the tear laden story of my sordid past and write a chapter in my diary which actually does have an end, an end which justifies all the pains that crucify my heart tonight.

How much longer?

Monday, April 13, 2009

Dreams, for my Love

The promises we make as we walk down the fragrant, windswept path of love, the promises to be together forever; the promise to be truthful in love. These are the promises which keep us going, even when the odds seem to be mounting against our eternal union.

The priceless worth of our dreams, inane and yet so magnificent that I breathe on them every living moment of my life. How I treasure the dreams of being together in the distant future, when time will matter no more and space will be so plentiful that we will bask in it.

“These dreams, will they be futile if they never come true?” asked my innocent face, with a tinge of pain in her velvet voice. A moment of silence as I ponder over my response, my mind relives my past and imagines my future and yet all I see is her, the visions of love that only come alive when I dream of a life with her. “No my love, these dreams are not futile, can never be for these dreams fill us with hope and the desire to live another day. They may never come true, but at the end of this lifetime; I will be a happier man for I had the fortune to dream of you, with you”

I dream of you even as I sit here watching the quaint moon spread its sliver across the otherwise darkened sky, just like your love drenches my life in its surreal glow. I dream of the moment when you rested your head on my shoulder, the look of contentment in your eyes, the divine smile which spoke of your realization and at that one moment I felt complete; I felt like a man who desires no more. I dream of holding your hand, when all that touches my skin is the warm, summer night breeze. I dream of kissing you every morning as I wake up, and imagine you sleeping in bliss right next to me – these are my dreams my love; my priceless dreams.

Far away in the land unseen by the prying eyes, I created a little home for us. A little place where I take you with me every time I close my eyes and let my dreams take over. The little, pristine cottage surrounded by flowers and swaying trees where no one but just we go. As the days of my life move on with the never ending dance of the sun, our little cottage in my dreams is the only place where time stands still; where you are forever beautiful and I am forever your man. It is here in the cottage of my dreams that our love defies destiny and finds its fulfilment.

Such is the power of my dreams my love and so I am glad I have them. For as long as I live; I shall dream on for in my dreams you are forever mine; truly and completely.

 

Monday, April 6, 2009

The Precise Moment of Failure

How bizarre!

My house has a room with no windows, I cannot look out, cannot stare in to your treacherous eyes that have misled the solemn, loyal Mask who had stood by you during your worse days.

I do not wish to believe in your new found obsession with truth and love. Why should I anyways, I have lived centuries and millenniums by being the precise antithesis of love and truth, I have mastered the arts of lust and deceit and taught it to many a foolish men like you. I stood unchallenged and unrivalled all these years and I refuse to accept defeat now.

The young woman called the Mask a cynic the last time I spoke, little does she know that I know men and their failing better then all else, I know exactly what will make your new found notions fall unsubstantiated and I know the exact moment when you shall call upon me to charm the innocent face; yet again.

How I wait for the fateful day, when I shall repossess your love and show her the charms of lust and deceit once again. Even the innocent face secretly endures your truthful love, for she knows that the treasures of being serenaded by a Mask are many, even though the end is swift. I shall give to her in a few days of ecstasy what you will not conjure in an entire lifetime of truthful love.

The moment, you ask? Of which precise moment am I speaking of?

The moment my slave; when your freedom is breached; when all your secret kingdoms are usurped by the combined entity that your love is creating; when you shall have no private space to call your own and when you no more remain your own man. The precise moment is the moment when your love breaches your independence. Will you then have the courage to spell to her the value of your freedom or will you be weak as you always have been and close your eyes and decide to summon me, the Mask of play along?

The men and their failings, so predictable and yet so enigmatic that neither men nor women learn from them. The Mask does and thus the Mask lives on; as you said when we began our dialogue - as a parasite!

Sunday, February 22, 2009

The Truthful Love

How does one ‘acquire’ love?

I do not wish to acquire Love, for love itself means the attainment of self. But since you ask this question Mask; let me tell you that I wish to have nothing in return for this love. My soul erupts in boundless joy every time I see her smile; my heart misses a thousand beats and yet thunders within every time I see the sparkle in her beautiful eyes.

What more can a Man ask for or seek when life in its entirety immerses itself in the million hues of love. I wish to be alive in this new found expression of truth and love today and for ever. In the decades leading up to this moment of truth I have compromised my existence between truth and escapism, love and greed. I have often mistaken love for lust and lust for love and often have I surrendered pregnant happiness to the lure of deceitful Masks.

Not this time my friend, for I stand at the cross roads of my eventful life; I have failed so often that I believed that I will have no more chances; but my destiny runs deep and I have one more chance to resurrect my life and future. My future lies not in acquiring love, but in nurturing it. My destiny beckons me; not to reach out; but to search within and bask in the goodness of the being that only true love can provide.

How complete I feel when she understands my silence, when she makes me smile even when the dark clouds of uncertainty hover above us. I feel like the Man I was always meant to be when she appreciates me for what I am, with all my failings; never once making me contemplate calling upon the Masks that I always fell back on before I had found love. I have no animosity towards you Mask, but I feel no more need of you; not today or ever for I am now truly in love.

The innocent Face is what I was always waiting for. With every passing day, the belief strengthens with in me that my life has now touched its core, my cause is complete and I seek no more. I seek not to acquire love for I am blessed with it; my soul is now truthfully embalmed in love. I seek not to acquire love; for no material possession will now be a cause big enough to make me compromise on the most divine possession of all – to be possessed by the love of the innocent Face!

 

Saturday, February 21, 2009

The Ominous Wait

The dance of life on the symphony of love; magnificent, surreal emotions as the man dances with the innocent face. When was the last I saw you in such blissful state, when was the last I saw the truthful smile dance across your face?

Deep within, even I am happy, even the Mask whom you so deplore this very moment feels happy for the child who has grown up to find the eternal happiness in the arms of the woman he so loves. I am not an evil Mask, I am just truthful to my creation. I play the game I was once summoned upon to play and I mince no emotions as I ensure that your lies remain wrapped under the veil of the Mask.

Even the most arduously impassive of the Masks develop a degree of attachment to the face they cling to; so do I. I feel happy to see you in love today; I admire your desire to love the face with all your childlike passion. Yet as I see you strain towards attaining the love of your life, my thoughts wander towards the once open pages of your life; the times when both you and I had made ourselves and each other believe that you had finally fallen in love. Even then the sweep of love was immense, the pull of desire so dramatic that I had felt left behind in its wake and yet those trysts with love now remain consigned to the backyard of your colourful past. What would you do now that you could not do then? What part of yourself will you be willing to surrender to acquire the elusive love that you had refused to part with then?

How much longer before you bring the Mask out; how much longer before the need to hide and conceal and secure your make believe world overtakes the selflessness of love?

How much longer before the Man surrenders his hard earned love to the comforts of being led and controlled by the Mask?

I shall wait.